How to be friends with someone who has a high IQ
Friendship has no limits, especially when you find someone who shares the same interests and passions as you. Friends, there are all kinds, of all sizes and even whose intelligence quotient or IQ can vary greatly. No matter what IQ you have, you can form a strong friendship with someone who has a genius IQ, as long as you make efforts to deepen your relationship and avoid the difficulties of interacting socially with people. very smart.
Part
1
Deepen your relationship
1
Focus on the person, not their intellect. If someone is very intelligent, chances are that those around them often only focus on their intelligence. Remember that your friend is a human being and not a brain! Paying close attention to your friend and their personality can help you have a good time together and strengthen your friendship [1] .
You should realize that those with a high IQ also tend to have few friends and may feel socially awkward. Because of this, you should choose to focus exclusively on your friend by spending time with them alone and not in a group [2] .
Know that you can totally recognize that your friend is intelligent. You just don't have to make it the focus of your conversations when you're spending time together. Instead, think about doing activities and talking about things you both enjoy.
Avoid believing stereotypes about smart people. He might not be as spunky as your other friends, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's exactly like the tough geeks portrayed on TV .
2
Have relevant conversations. Discussions are an important factor in all relationships. They can make a person feel appreciated, considered and supported. This same rule applies to the smartest people. Fuel discussions with your smart friend and talk about topics that both of you like or talk about problems that one of you may have had [4] .
Be sure to listen very carefully to what your friend is saying and what they like to discuss. This will let him know that you care about the important things in his life.
Make sure your conversations cover serious matters as well as lighter topics. You could talk about intellectual things or else completely stupid! No one can have 100% serious conversations all day long, and your friendship can even be a great outlet for each other's silly side. For example, if your friend is talking about a funny show, ask them about it and think of other similar shows you could talk about.
Don't forget to comment on any sentence he comes up with and ask questions to show that you care and care about him.
3
Make your friend's intelligence no longer the center of attention. When a person is very intelligent or has a high IQ, they may feel that others only focus on that aspect of their personality. Remember that human beings are multi-faceted and have much more to offer than just their intelligence or other character traits they may have. Instead of focusing on your friend's brain power, forget about it. Shift your attention to other things like his great sense of humor or the activities you do together. This will not only fuel your conversations, but also show your friend that your interest in them goes beyond their intelligence [5] .
Examine your friend's personality before meeting him. Ask yourself what his other character traits are and find a way to focus on that during your conversations. For example, you could say You love experimenting with food so much! How do you not get nauseous? Would you like to go to dinner one of these days so that you show me?
Consider being direct with your friend about focusing on intelligence. For example, you could say Damn, look I like to talk about nerd stuff, but after a while my brain goes to mush. Tell me instead, have you seen the ad for Nora Ephron's latest romantic comedy?
4
Compromise to have common interests. Be sure to mention your own interests when chatting with your friend. This can steer the conversation and help your friend realize that you're not just interested in their intelligence. Also, it can cause you (both) to make compromises to develop the relationship [6] .
Use your friend's interests or comments to introduce your own interests. For example, if your friend says he wants to watch the latest Star Wars movie, take the opportunity to say I don't really like sci-fi movies, but I love romantic comedies. I'd love to watch Star Wars though, who knows, it might change my mind . You could also say I love Vietnamese food too, but if we go tonight, could we try this new Mexican restaurant next time?
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5
Have common experiences. Whatever your respective interests, try doing different activities together. In the process, you might find adventure, strengthen your friendship, and have a blast [7] .
Do things you both enjoy. May this guide you in your future experiences that can strengthen your friendship. For example, suggest that your friend try a new restaurant or cook with you. You could also go skydiving or skydiving together.
Consider doing a mix of fun and serious activities. For example, if your friend is an eminent scientist, a trip to visit the local science museum could be a good way for you to understand his talents, allow him to shine and even pique your interest. It might also help you both deal with group dynamics in a positive way.
Consider taking vacations or going on field trips together. Relaxing together can strengthen your friendship and help you take your mind off your friend's intelligence. Make sure you each have time for yourself, which can be very important for someone with a high IQ.
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6
Maintain your independence. You might sometimes feel intimidated by a friend with a very high IQ and assume that every decision they make is rational and sensible. However, it is important that you continue to be yourself and defend your point of view and your opinions. This will show your friend that you respect yourself, but also that you respect his independence [8] .
Be sure to give your friend space. Many intelligent people thrive in relationships where they are not constantly with each other [9] . It allows you to be friends with other people, which can make you smarter and more socially balanced [10] .
Be assertive and believe in your opinions. It could set a foundation for more meaningful conversations with your friend. If he really is your friend, he will take your opinion into account and give you the chance to voice it without interrupting you or making you feel like you're stupid [11] .
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7
Make your friend feel important. Everyone wants to feel special and appreciated by their family, peers and friends. People with a high IQ are no exception to this rule. Make sure your friend knows that you appreciate every aspect of their personality and enjoy spending time with them when you have the chance [12] .
Show joy at your friend's successes, even if it comes at your expense. Having the ability to be sincerely happy for each other, no matter what, is a sign of true friendship. You can send your friend a message or say Well done or I'm so happy for you .
Listen to your friend's needs. There may be times when people will laugh at your friend or he will feel pressured to always be the best because of his high IQ. Listen to your friend's concerns, find a way to deal with them, and then try to comfort them.
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8
Get your friend to meet other people. One of the best ways to make a new friend is to meet a friend's friends . Consider getting your friend with a high IQ to meet your other friends, which could give them new and different perspectives. Remember that very smart people often don't feel very comfortable in a group, so you should limit the number of people to 3 or 4 for a start.
Keep the atmosphere as relaxed as possible and don't tell your other friends about the person's IQ. If you did, it might cause them to focus on your friend's intelligence and prevent them from seeing him as a multi-faceted individual.
Ask your smart friend if he would like to meet your other friends before setting up this event. He might feel more comfortable if he's just with you alone. However, he could also be very receptive to the idea of meeting your other comrades.
Make sure your friends know you appreciate this smart person, even if they don't fit in very well with the group. Explain that your friend feels overwhelmed and a little anxious to be around such interesting and intelligent people [14] .
Part
2
Manage any difficulties
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1
Accept the positives and negatives. No one has a unique personality. On the contrary, we all have several character traits. Being a good friend also means accepting each other's personality traits. Take the good and bad sides of your friendship as they come, as it can help you forge a stronger and better relationship [15] .
Be understanding of any issues that may arise with a smart friend. Don't forget that he can be very good when it comes to mathematics and terribly clumsy when it comes to human relations [16] . For example, if your friend feels threatened, they might fall back on their intelligence to boost their self-confidence. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone, forget about this behavior of your friend.
Be understanding whenever your friend is in a bad mood, having a bad day, or getting socially weird. You could always explain this to others by saying Normally he is very fun and laid back, but he is currently under a lot of stress and it makes him a bit surly and anxious. I hope you will have the opportunity to meet my friend at a better time .
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2
Remember why you became friends. Whether it was sharing toys in the sandbox or working in a lab at college, there was a spark that started your friendship. Think about the bond you have with your friend if you can't get along or if your friendship is falling apart.
Think about what you have in common. Was it your common passion for World of Warcraft or was it your interest in football that started this friendship? Did you both take part in the Épèle-moi contest at school? Have you both been employed in a fast food restaurant? Whatever interests you shared in the past, build from there to continue your friendship.
Ask yourself about your friend's personality in all its dimensions. Is this intelligent person also kind and intelligent or does he rather have a strong character and the ability to decipher others? Focus on the qualities that make him special, rather than what annoys you.
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3
Accept your friend's individuality. Highly gifted people may show unique character traits such as being extremely creative or passionate about specific things. Your smart friend might also not approach problems the same way your other friends do, and that's also what makes them unique and special. Instead of being irritated or even embarrassed by your friend's personality, remember that his intelligence and quirks are part of who he is, just like his other character traits. Realizing this can help strengthen your friendship .
Tell your friend or remind them if they're acting weird. You can do this in a fun way by asking Do ghosts always have this effect on you? or Can you teach me how to think so quickly?
Remember that each of your friends, regardless of their IQ, is unique and has quirks or traits unique to their nature as human beings.
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4
Use your own qualities too. A friendship requires the involvement of two people, so keep in mind that you and your smart friend are an important part of this relationship. Even if your friend enjoys discussing quantum physics, it's important to remind them that you also have talents and traits that you bring to this relationship .
Remember your character traits that your friend appreciates. He may appreciate your irreverent sense of humor or your ability to see the good in others. Bringing out these traits can strengthen your relationship.
Use humor if necessary. If your friend starts obsessing over something beyond you, bring them back to reality by saying While you're busy playing genius, I think I just found us a new adventure! Imagine us making pottery while drinking beer!
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5
Be honest when in doubt. Honesty is another cornerstone of friendship, even when you're hanging out with someone very smart. If you're worried that you're not smart enough for your friend with the phenomenal IQ, remember that he appreciates you and values your friendship. Have a frank discussion with him and talk about your fears and concerns about your friendship. You might find that your friend fears the same things [19] .
Bring up the subject in a non-confrontational way with your friend. For example, you could say Sometimes when you change the subject like this, I wonder why you want to be friends with me. I didn't really understand what you just said .
Try to focus more on your friendship and less on the intelligence or comparison between the two of you. Avoid feeling intimidated by your friend's intelligence by reminding yourself that there are plenty of things you can do better than him.
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6
Remember that being smart does not mean being able to behave well socially. Think about your friend and other smart people you know. You will surely realize that they fail to integrate well socially. In fact, many intelligent people suffer from social anxiety, which may be due to overthinking or overanalyzing situations, putting pressure on themselves, or being unable to manage their emotions [20] . Thinking about the social difficulties your smart friend may have will allow you to better manage your friendship and the interactions between the two of you and others.
Help your high-IQ friend manage their relationships with others more effectively by supporting them or boosting their self-confidence. For example, you could take the focus away from her intelligence by saying You know, Christina and I have been friends for over 20 years now and she probably won't tell you, but she paints amazingly .
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7
Explain your friend's way of being to others. If your friend hasn't met your other classmates yet, or they're seeing each other for the first time, give others tips on how they can approach him. Some might be offended by your friend's intelligence or responses to given situations, and your input might help them understand him better.
Tell your other friends about your smart friend. Say, I'm really, really excited to introduce you to Simon. We have been friends for years and he is wonderful. I just wanted you to know that he is incredibly smart and can be reserved at times. Just give yourself a chance to get to know him and I'm sure you'll love him as much as I do.
Remind your friends that being smart sometimes means being unfit to behave well socially. You might say, I'm really sorry that my friend reacted so arrogantly. He doesn't always manage to behave well in public, but I can guarantee you that he is a really nice person and you will know it if you give him a chance .
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8
Say it if you see your friend has gone too far. In some cases, your smart friend may be overly arrogant or even rude to others who may not be as smart or talkative. If this happens, you should report the problem to your friend and explain to them why what they have done is not acceptable.
Avoid embarrassing your friend as much as you can. Instead, discuss the issue in private. You could say Sam, you know, the answer you gave to Pat was really condescending and totally unnecessary. He does not have to have the same facility as you to understand certain things and you should realize that not everyone is like you in this aspect. You really need to be more sensitive and think more of others in this type of situation .
Release any tension by making sarcastic remarks. For example, you can say Well, now that we all feel like total jerks, let's see how we can fix this . Not only can this help solve other problems, but it could also tell your friend what mistake they made.
Support your friend no matter what, even if you disagree with what he has done. For example, if your friend is being cocky about someone's intelligence, you could show your support by saying I understand why you said that, but there might be a more diplomatic way to say it. .
Advice
Remember that you too have special qualities. There are definitely things only you can do or things you know better than your friend.
Keep in mind that just because someone is smarter than you doesn't mean they can't like you. If people are nice to you, be nice to them too. If someone is being arrogant or mean to you, ignore them and focus on those who are looking up to you.
Remember that having a high IQ does not mean being a genius in all areas. If the person is an artist, they may not see special math skills or appreciate being treated like a walking calculator. If he is a mathematician, he may not be very eloquent.
Warnings
Avoid teasing a friend with a high IQ. Chances are he was teased throughout his childhood and that could bring back some bad memories. He may even have been severely bullied when he was younger.
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